So Blessed

It is a great honor to be able to say-"I remember the day you were born." I will always be able to say that to my precious Josue. Today he is 1 year old.

Josue was born on a Wednesday at 1:14 p.m. Early on Tuesday morning, I had decided that I was too bored sitting at home confined to bed rest!! I am not one of those people that can just sit around and do nothing for a long period of time. I have to be doing something all the time or I just get bored and depressed! I had had enough of the bed rest and decided that going to watch a movie didn't break any of the bed rest rules. I would still be sitting and not doing a lot of walking. That day I really wanted to see "Step Up 2:The Streets." I know it's a totally cheesy movie but I had seen the first one and I wanted to see the follow-up. Later I was going to watch another movie and just basically enjoy my day going out to eat, watching movies and then going to Barnes and Noble.

I went to eat at Olive Garden which I am so glad that I did! I didn't know that for the next 24 hours, I would not be allowed to eat anything!!! Then, I went to the Rave and sat down in my seat to watch the movie. Nothing was unusual. I was three weeks away from giving birth to Josue and he hadn't yet settled lower in my stomach so I didn't feel that there was any danger in being 40 minutes away from home and the hospital. After the movie, I had to make a little detour to the restroom. When you are pregnant, it seems like you go to the bathroom every 10-15 minutes and of course, it doesn't help when the baby decides to kick you in the bladder! I went about my business in the bathroom and all of the sudden I heard a pop and felt water rushing out. For a minute, I thought my water had broken but couldn't be sure because I had never gone through the birthing process! As I left the bathroom, I decided to call my mom, my husband and my dad(in that order) to tell them what had happened. My mom suggested that I call my nurse midwife and go back to Cleveland right away.

Later, on my way home, I called my friend Lainey and told her what had happened. Since she had just gone through giving birth two months prior, I felt she would be the authority on the subject. We talked and she also suggested for me to contact my nurse midwife. I called Daryl a few minutes later and explained the situation. She asked me to go to the hospital and that she would meet me there later. Throughout everything, I felt such a mix of emotions. I was excited, scared, nervous but above all of that, I just wanted to know if Josue was okay and if this little incident meant that he had decided to make his first appearance a little earlier!

Halfway through my 40 minute drive back to Cleveland, my dad called me and told me to meet him at the first exit going into Cleveland. He was going to take me to the hospital while my mom gathered the family together and made sure my husband Roberto got everything I needed and Josue needed. A word of advice-Pack your Bags!!!! Don't leave it for your husband to do! He will bring 5 outfits for the baby and one shirt and maybe a toothbrush for you! Men don't work well under baby being born pressure. They totally freak out or faint!

As soon as I got to the exit, I parked my car at the nearest gas station. When I got out of the car, reality set in. I started gushing water and it was not pretty! I couldn't believe that my water had actually broken!! I was freezing to death when my dad got there. He quickly took me to Skyridge to get admitted. On the way there, I kept saying-"He's coming, isn't he?" "He's going to be born in the next 24 hours!!" I was scared to death!!! Knowing that that baby has to come out some way out of your body does not give you pleasant thoughts!

When I got to the hospital, I was wet and cold and all I wanted was to get into dry clothes and have Josue! It took much longer to do that and pretty much I was uncomfortable for the rest of the time until after Josue's birth. From the moment I got into my birthing room to the time I was wheeled into my C-section, I was given so many different medications, that I just stopped asking!! I won't lie to you and tell you that the whole experience was not painful. It is the most pain I have ever had in my life!!! On top of that, most of the time you can't drink nor eat anything, which is torture to me!!!

Throughout the night, I had the worst cramps of my life!! I was not a happy camper. I could see the advantage of getting the epidural and by the time 7 a.m. rolled around, I was ready for that big shot in my back!! The shot didn't even hurt and the pain suddenly went away. It was heaven!! The rest of my time was spent waiting to see what would happen next.

Even though I had been given all those medications to help me give birth naturally, Josue still didn't position himself correctly in the birth canal. Although I was disappointed, I knew that the most important thing was for him to be healthy when he came out so I opted for the C-section. It seemed like 5 minutes after I said "Okay, give me the C-section", I was wheeled into the operation room. I was terrified!! Would I feel the cutting? Would Josue make it out?? I just held on to Roberto's hand and asked God to give me strength. All of the sudden, Roberto and I heard the most beautiful sound-Josue crying!! There are few sounds that inspire such overwhelming emotions. To know that you have given birth to this precious child and have gotten to see your child come into the world, is the biggest honor.

After that, Roberto proudly cut Josue's cord(which by the way, he had talked about forever and probably at some point practiced to make sure he got it right!). I was able to kiss Josue before he was whisked off to another room. Surgery finished later on and Josue was brought back to me and even though I felt pretty horrible after the surgery, I just looked at him and thought that he was so tiny and so fragile and I hoped that we would do a good job in taking care of him.

Josue has grown so much in this year. A friend of mine told me that the first year is one of the most amazing years in a child's life. They go from being quiet, sleepy, fragile and tiny creatures to loud, always awake, sturdy, laughing, smiling, crying, talking, walking, screaming, loving babies!! When I get home from work, the first person I see is Josue and he always has that beautiful smile for me. He is happy to see his mom and I am happy to see my boy. Roberto and I feel so blessed to have him and to see him grow up. I just want to enjoy my time with him because the time really does go by so fast. Happy Birthday Josue!!

Bye bye 2008. Hello 2009!

I apologize that my last blog was so negative. I know that probably this wasn't the best way to vent and maybe not very mature. So I guess one of my resolutions should be to be more mature about things I can never change! In any case, I want this blog to be positive and maybe uplifting. I feel that I was so blessed in 2008. I was pregnant for the first two months of 2008 and then of Feb. 27th, 2008, Josue came into this world. I know that no one is prepared to be a parent. I read all the books and had most things ready except for my bag to take to the hospital(must remember that for next time or I will get stuck with a bunch of baby outfits and one shirt for me!)but nothing prepared me for hearing Josue cry for the first time. I was just amazed that a human being had actually come out of me!! It is a surreal experience and even though I was way drugged up, I still can remember every single thing that happened. For that, I am thankful.

I was so scared during the first two months of Josue's life. I thought I was going to break him but I found that he is pretty sturdy and now that he is 10 months old, we throw him up in the air and he gets the biggest smile on his face! Roberto and I continue learning new things about Josue and his personality. He adds so much joy to our house and I know my parents and brother and sister would say the same. My hope is that his family in Chile will get to know Josue soon and he will have the opportunity to get to know the Chilean culture and people.

Josue was the biggest even in my life this year but there were other things that happened as well. My sister Priscilla went to Japan for three months and decided to stay for 6 months! I have to admit that this has not been easy for me. She is my best friend and there are times when I miss her very much. Christmas and New Year's was not the same without her! However, I am so happy for her because she is happy in Japan and has so many friends and is doing ministry at the TLC COG. The members of the TLC church are awesome! They have taken Priscilla in and made her part of their family. I can't wait for the day Roberto, Josue and I get to meet Priscilla's family in Japan.

My brother Steven or Esteban as he now is called had an eventful end of the year. He had to have gall bladder surgery plus a couple more surgeries in December. We thought he wouldn't be able to come for Christmas but he was tough and one day after being released from the hospital he endured a 14 hour drive to Cleveland, TN. I am so happy he got to be here for Christmas and New Year and of course that he gets to see Josue and spend time with him. He is a wonderful uncle!

My mom and dad have also been blessed this year. I know they would say that Josue has been one of the biggest blessings! They along with Josue's Chilean grandparents are the best grandparents. I have always prayed for wonderful grandparents for my children, future children, my brother and sister's children and God answered my prayer. Grandpa Jorge, Grandma Elisabeth, Grandpa Francisco and Grandma Sonia are awesome!!

There have been some things that have not been so good this year especially for my mom. Both her parents have been very sick. In this next week, my mom will be going back to Chile to take care of my grandma who has lung cancer. She is doing everything to make this time in my grandparent's life as easy as possible. It makes me sad that she has to go through this and also that I probably won't get to see either of my grandparents before they pass. I hope that she is able to spend as much time as she can with them in 2009.

Roberto and I have had a crash course in parenting and life this past year. I think we have done pretty well. We went through a time there where we didn't feel direction in the ministry area but God opened new doors for us and so we are working again and learning. We know what God ultimately wants us to do but we know we have a lot of work to do before we get there. We are committed to the Lord, each other and Josue.

I love to start a new year. I have my calendar ready. I still haven't written my resolutions but I am working on it. I just love the fact that we can start new things and change bad habits or learn good habits! I am not sure what 2009 will bring. I know that I am trusting the Lord to be there at every moment. I hope 2009 is a blessed year for all of you!